A Woman's Choice

The "Mama Drama" and what has been dubbed as "The Mommy Wars" just seem totally ridiculous to me. Most of us have at one time or another run into "that Mom"...

You know who I am talking about. She believes her way is the only way, and uses every ounce of energy she has to voice her unsolicited opinion on the playground, at church, online...you name it. She is there ready and waiting to put you down, make you feel guilty (as if we all don't have enough Mommy guilt to deal with on our own!), make you second guess yourself in a sorry effort to validate her own choices in her role as a parent. I could go on and on...

My all time favorite are those that offer parenting advice, who 'lo and behold don't even have children. We had all the answers until we actually became parents, right? Your single friend, your married friend that does not have children by choice, family members, even complete strangers in line, or even online, it seems everyone has an opinion.

The choice I am referring to in this post is whether or not a woman should go back to work after having a child/children. Some argue that a Mom's place is at home raising her own kids, and if she chooses to go back to work then she is selfish and a second rate Mom. If she has no choice but to go back to work to survive financially, then she is granted pity (bless her heart).

Personally, I do feel my place is at home. This is what works for me and my family. I also run a business from home, in an effort to keep my sanity and to continue following my own dreams and desires. Does this make me a selfish second rate Mom? I think not. I truly believe it makes me a better Mom, and my children reap the benefits of me doing what fulfills me, being home with them while also fitting in work here and there when I can, working diligently to make my own dreams come true. Hopefully they will learn by example.

I have known plenty of women that choose to go back to work. I know for a fact that they would literally lose themselves and possibly their minds if they did what I do day in and day out. Does this make them a selfish second rate Mom? No. They are better mothers working outside the home then they would be if they stayed home with their children.

If you are fortunate enough to actually have a choice in whether or not you return to work, be grateful. Many Moms are not that fortunate and due to life's circumstances, the choice is made for them...whether they like it or not.

We all have to find our own way. Choices such as whether or not to return to work, deciding to breast or bottle feed, to home school or not, to vaccinate or not...these are also personal decisions. Not one of them are easy. We must make choices that benefit our family, do what is best for us.

I really think the "Mommy Wars" are a waste of time. Parenting is tough enough, and we all have enough guilt to go around. Our time would be better spent supporting one another in whatever choices we make. After all, as Moms we do the best we can, learn as we go and always have our children's best interest at heart. This my friends, is the common thread that bonds us all!